Resources

When the grief of a child is denied.

Why did Dad leave without saying goodbye?

Sadly, until recently children were often excluded from funerals, something we recognise today as harmful. Christine was only seven when her father died and she will never forget it.  But one emotion that loomed large for a long time after was anger – not because Fred had died but because … Read more

The ideal vs the real family

Norman’s children all believe they know what he would want when he is dying.

I picked up many, many gems of wisdom from North Sydney’s ‘Conversations about Death and Dying’ on Saturday, (May 25, 2019.) It never ceases to amaze me that no matter how much you think you know about a subject there is always so much more to learn.

No more higher motive

"I cannot conceive of any higher or more charitable motive to induce humanity to to its best than that which lends comfort to the last moments of the human being," Rabbi Davis, 1903

“I cannot conceive of any higher or more charitable motive to induce humanity to do its best than that which lends comfort to the last moments of the human being,” Rabbi Davis, 1903 When CEO of St Vincents, Sydney, Associate Professor Anthony Schembri, was working in the hospital’s archives recently, … Read more

Passing all Understanding

When I started interviewing people about their experiences of death, my selection process was a fairly random one. That was deliberate because I wanted the conversations to reflect life around me as it is in my country, in my time, in my culture – no pretence, no artifice, no filter. … Read more

Saying goodbye with architecture

funeral ceremony centre, courtesy Hofman Dujardin Architects

Nearly 80,000 words later and close to completing my ‘life affirming book about death’, I’m back. With more ideas, challenges and stories of people’s experiences to share, as we talk about death. This is one: what if better architecture makes better goodbyes? Here’s something wonderful – thank you to the UK’s … Read more

Help with end of life care directions has just arrived.

Help with end of life care directions for elderly Australians has just arrived.

Help with end of life care directions  has just arrived – for elderly Australians – in the form of the ELDAC website. (https://www.eldac.com.au/) Funded and supported by the Australian Government, it’s an internet tool developed by palliative care experts from around the country. The package has documents, videos and information … Read more

Could an end of life doula help to midwife your death? 

End of life doula Belinda Brooks

Could an end of life doula, or amicus mortis help to midwife your death?  ‘Doula’ is a Greek word for a woman who gives support, help, and advice to another woman during pregnancy and during and after birth. The word has now spread to cover the same style of care for someone who is dying.

Other expressions which cover support at the end of life are “midwife to the dying” and the Latin term “amicus mortis”, the friend of the dying.

The Grieve Project

The Grieve Project

The Grieve Project is great because everyone who participates is a winner. When your reader connects with something you’ve said, something powerful is shared. But the best thing is, even if no-one else ever sees it, when we write about our grief, it’s easier to understand. When we write our … Read more

Now that the funeral is over

Introducing Doris Zagdanski, who works with one of the largest funeral providers in Australia. She is also the author of many books about grief. Doris is currently giving a lot of thought to that most difficult of times – when the funeral is over. “After the funeral we shut the … Read more

The Kiwi Coffin Club

Kiwi Coffin Club - A group of rebellious, creative Kiwi seniors give death the finger, one crazy coffin at a time. Made with the support of NZ on Air.

Love the way these baby-boomers are rethinking the end, turning old ideas on their head, the way they always have – while making friends and tap-dancing.

The Grief of a Child

“Children can experience grief and loss from a very young age. Like adults, children have their own ways of grieving. It is important to recognise that your child has feelings of grief and to help them express those feelings.” “Children are curious, so be prepared for regular and repeated questions. … Read more

The fig tree

Troubled stories from recent deathbeds remind me of a sign at my daughters’ old school: “Beware falling pods!” The sign sat at the base of an enormous native fig tree and when those pods fell, they were like malevolent missiles. Dropping from a great height helped the pods to crack … Read more

The Grief Kaleidoscope

A book by Su-Rose McIntyre Su-Rose  says: “I began my grief journey eight years ago with the unexpected death of my only child and son, Carl – a beautiful young man, loved by many. His loss left me feeling bereft and fearful about what lay ahead…No day was ever the … Read more

Wow! Would you dare host one of these dinners?

I’m wondering: would I be game enough to host one of these dinners? My family are coming over for dinner tonight….. Thanks Susie P. for letting me know about this fascinating conversation starter. http://deathoverdinner.org.au/      

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