When I opened Good Grief! this year I quoted a reflection by L. R. Knost which touched debate both online and off. Some found the suggestion of mending too painful. To these good folk the quote felt glib.
We want to hold close the memory of someone who’s died: it’s a generous feeling about the dead person and it’s about wishing they had more life, more opportunities, more love to both give and receive, more opportunities to walk in fields of wildflowers.
So suggesting moving on and renewal feels insensitive to some: are the mourned to be tossed out, dismissed, replaced? And it overlooks the fact that for that dead person, life will never come back.
Too often people feeling this way about those they grieve are shut down, told to get over it, told to move on. So they feel not only sad but judged for their sadness.
If people want to talk about their grief – from the inside – Good Grief! says ‘Go for it!’ Keep sharing those thoughts, no matter how unacceptable they might be in other places. Good Grief! believes that using words will help you with your grief, help you find ways to manage it that suit you and to a timetable that works for you.